Three months and going strong

Hooray! You made it through your first quarter. The peeps have said that this is where a lot of changes happen, but I gotta tell you, a lot's already changed.

For example, despite the crotch photo bomb in this pic of us, Dan's around a lot less. On the plus side, Tiia's around a lot more. It's a trade up, but don't tell your dad.

Another change I noticed was the crowdedness of my bed. It was bad enough having to share it with those two, but then you jumped in. When you're used to 60%, dropping down to 45% is a tough pill(ow) to swallow. Thankfully, your room's done and you're in it now. Bliss.

Lesson learned.

I've been known to lick pee from time to time. You'd be surprised what kind of info you can get from a taste of the old Number One. For example, the other day I noted a hint of liver treat on the back leg of a park bench. I miss liver treats. Sigh.

Anyway, Milo fountain-peed all over the floor today while Dan was changing him and I had to know what it was like. That was a bad idea. Baby pee isn't anything like dog pee. It smells like pee. It tastes like pee. Can't say I wasn't disappointed.

But then we went for a walk and I found a lovely mozzarella stick (see above). And all was right in the world again.

My very own Maui Doll.

This is the Yurkenbaum signature gift for new people. It's called the Maui Doll. It's more of a spiritual likeness.

I loved when Milo came so we could finally have a Maui Doll of our own. Then I found out that it's actually called Licorice The Dog. It came as quite the shock, but I'm nothing if not a dog of action. Since at least 40 people know him as the Maui Doll now, I'm pleading my case to blabla. Here it goes:

Five Good Reasons To Rename Him The Maui Doll

5. We sent one to Noah and Ebba in Sweden, where 'licorice' is pronounced 'lakritsrot'. That's probably a mouthful for them, even without all that yummy lakritsrot.

4. Dan and Tiia buy them in Kol-Kid, and they don't let real dogs in. That's seven years of being taunted by (who I thought was) my namesake; only being able to appreciate him from afar. It was difficult, especially in the winter.

3. If you have to say it's a dog, it doesn't look enough like a dog. Like when Fox News says they're fair and balanced.

2. Stewie. I love Charlie (and you'd love her too), but she's gotta learn.

1. Our ears are similarly shaped. Which reminds me that I haven't had a good ear scratch in a while. Milo has long fingers. This bodes well for the future.

Life with a baby

Today I went for two long walks, napped with Tiia and Milo all afternoon and had lobster for dinner. It's not so bad. G'nite.

First Björn

Dan, Milo and I went for our first boy walk the other day. Other than Dan putting the Björn on upside down (yeah he did), it was a success. I got a few frisbee throws. Dan got some fresh air after being cooped up all day. And Milo amazingly didn't slip out the top.

Ask The Maui Monster

Dear Maui Monster...

Congrats on the new baby! And nice to have you back.
My people put a car seat in my spot. What can I do to get it back? Should I pee on it? 

- Displaced


Hi Displaced.

You could do much worse if you wanted, but it won't matter. That thing isn't going anywhere. All you can do is get used to your new spot behind the driver's seat.

For the record, I never had a back-seat preference (I'm more of a picky sleeper than a picky traveller), but there's a lot to embrace about the left.  For example, having traffic whiz by vs. glide along completely changes the car ride experience, especially with your head out. You can make a game of it. See if you can catch a full license plate as it passes. It's harder than it sounds.

Also, if your chauffeur ever momentarily freaks out because he thinks he forgot you somewhere when he really didn't, he can just turn his head to see you if you're back right. But in the back left, he has to reach back and feel for you. I try using it as an opportunity for an extra bum rub, but getting into position fast enough is also harder than it sounds.

And if I were you, I wouldn't get too comfy in your new spot either. Actually that's good advice for both of us.

We'll share when you're older.

The other day, a drop of formula fell from the side of Milo's mouth on to his leg as Dan was feeding him and I had to know what it tasted like.

That was a mistake.

The Third Yurkenbaum

This is Milo Yurkenbaum. Well, actually, it's Milo Yurman. Well, actually it's Miles Logan Yurman. But in reality, it's Milo Yurkenbaum.  Maui and Milo. We could be a cartoon strip. Actually, that's not a bad idea.

That's a picture of me pulling Milo aside for a quick tete-a-tete the other day. I noticed that he was getting awfully comfy in the bed when Dan and Tiia would put him down on it. After how hard I worked to earn my spot, I had to lay down the law. I think he understood where I was coming from. He nodded, but I understand that may have also been gas.

The Nine Months of Awesome

Dan: Sit down for a second, Maui. We have to talk.

Maui: What's up, daddy-o?

Dan: Yeah, about that. Y'know how you've been top banana around here for a while? That's gonna be changing pretty soon.

Maui: I figured as much with all the new baby stuff lying about. I'm pretty excited  — the other dogs told me all about the Nine Months of Awesome!

Dan: The what?

Maui: You know...the time before the baby comes where we get to do everything I've always wanted before you have no more time for me.

Dan: Um....

Maui: Don't worry, I've got our itinerary covered.  I figure we'd hit the cottage for a few days because you guys sucked with taking me swimming this summer (uh...hello...WATER dog???). After that, I have a Cheese Makers of the World tour mapped out for us!

Dan: Wait...I have to...

Maui: Hold on, you're gonna love this. Now I know you think I'm gonna say we start in Oka, but I'm actually thinking we go west and start in New Zealand; apparently their Sunset Blue is a...

Dan: MAUI!

Maui: What?

Dan: We're adopting a baby. It's a boy. And he's coming next week.

Maui: silence

Dan: Do you have anything you'd like to ask?

Maui: What about my Nine Months of Awesome?

Dan: The best I can offer you a Kingsmeade Sunset Blue IOU.

Maui: Best offer?

Dan: Best offer.

Maui: I'll take it, but under formal protest.

Dan: Noted.

How can you not forgive that face?

That's my buddy Charlie up there with Stewie and Abba, but those weren't their names when I gave them. The plan was for her to call them Maui and Meewau. I even whispered that in her ear the day I gave the grey one (Abba) to her sister Zoey. I guess she wasn't speaking dog yet. Or she was and chose to ignore my advice. It wouldn't be the first time one my suggestions fell on deaf ears. I'm still waiting for construction to start on a mini cheese cupboard above my bowls.

Trying to get it back.

We went for a seven-minute walk this morning. Not exactly what I had in mind when I jumped out of bed. On the positive side, I'm almost asleep again which is really nice because, before we left for our 'walk', I was walking through a shallow stream with yummy baked salmon everywhere. How does baked salmon swim, you ask? Not fast enough to avoid the Maui Monster.  Oh look, there goes a dijon-crusted one. My favourite.

A sad day.

Kai died today. He was a good fish and a good friend. I wonder what tomorrow's gonna be like without him to talk to about my morning walk? He liked it when I would tell him about the pond in Wychwood Park. He always wanted to see the algae. I'm not sure why.

I heard Dan and Tiia talk about getting a new fish tomorrow. I haven't given the 'Welcome to Team Yurkenbaum' speech in a while. I think it goes like.. WAIT...HOLD THE PHONE!!!

He lives! Holy crap! He lives!! Dan was holding his lifeless body by the tail not two hours ago, and he lives!  He is a good fish!!! Good thing the peeps are procrastinators – he'd be half way to the lake by now. We're so doing the Wychwood walk tomorrow.

Not such a sad day after all.  : )

Hmmmm...?

We got back from our walk before 9:30 this morning.
Something strange is happening.

I don't get it

The peeps don't like it when I roll around in dead bird. I think it's because they haven't tried it. If they did, they'd know how wonderfully pungent it is.

Back to bed.

With age comes wisdom

I tried out the salt and pepper look the other day. I'm almost seven now, and I wanted to know I could rock it if it comes. Consider it rocked.

The poster at the vet's office says seven is when dogs become 'old', but I don't feel older. I do feel wiser, though. For example, I've recently learned that I can avoid the salt on the sidewalk by just walking on the adjacent snow-covered lawn.

I can also avoid sidewalks with no adjacent snow-covered lawn by just refusing to go. Dan and Tiia backtrack and find another way. I got the idea to do that one morning while sprawled out in our king-sized bed as Tiia was up against the edge and Dan was basically hanging off it. They're so accommodating – but I learned that a long time ago.

Oh El Dee

Dan forgot my leash at the office. I bet he thought it was gonna be a problem. Not for this pup, my friend. I'm a people pooch. Speaking of people, it's been crazy busy around here the last little while, what with the holidays and all. Lots of parties at my house. Most of it was fun. Some of it was embarrassing...

That wasn't so hard, was it?

I was at a New Year's party at Aunty Julie's last night (that's me with Charlie up there). She asked all the peeps to put their resolutions in a glass and then they all guessed whose was whose. I was a bit hurt when no one asked me for one; but then was relieved because I didn't have one; but then was disappointed that I didn't have one; but then was determined to come up with one. Then it hit me. I'm going to do more of this.

At some point, Dan mentioned that it seems more real if you write it down. We'll see if he's right.