Going to Ed before dinner

Whenever I'm with Dan's folks, I always make sure to get a chin scratch from Grampa Ed. He applies just the right amount of finger pressure and he never rushes it. Also, the golf calluses give them an added sensation that really cranks my tail.

Roger and Jessica Rabbit

Jessica Rabbit has been driving Team Yurkenbaum around since the beginning – and no matter how much crap Dan and Tiia put in the back seat, she always found a way to make me comfortable. She did have this annoying habit of funneling in a deafening wind when only my window was open..but I guess she was just drawn up that way.

Jessica will be meeting her maker tomorrow, but not before she meets G-Dub, her nephew and Team Yurkenbaum's new chariot. Down there, that's me in my new spacious new travel cabin (yeah right), and that's Roger in the back seat, who was nice enough to let me come along for the test drive. The world needs more dog-friendly people. Bravo, Roger. Bravo.

Doggleganger?

About three years ago, before Page 7 got off the ground, Dan and I talked about getting me in front of the camera. We thought there was a shortage of cute black dogs out there. Looks like we missed our window.

Ask The Maui Monster

Dear Maui Monster

My people won't take me out with them everywhere they go. Today they went on a girly shopping mission and I thought for sure they'd take me because I'm one of the girls, but they left me at home. What do you suggest?

Stuck at home Sophie

Dear Sophie,

It's too bad you didn't get to go because you would've had fun – the girls are in fine form these days. Jacko and I got to hang with them at girlie brunch the other day. It was a hoot from the word "go".

What you need to do is divide and conquer; appeal to the girls individually and get them to advocate for you the next time they go out. I understand you have until Tuesday night to make it happen. Here's how I would approach each of them:

Auntie Robyn: Do something absurd and let her see you do it, but make sure the others aren't around so she can describe it to them. She'll make you look good.

Aunty Julie: With everyone else available to hold Charlie, she might need something to do with her hands. Bring her something for her to play with you. Not a diaper.

Tiia: Snuggle up to her when she's on the couch. The cuter you can make yourself look, the more likely she'll be to give you cheese. Trust me.

Charlie: I haven't spent a lot of time with Charlie yet, but from what I can remember, stay away from telling her the story of the Jewish people; Dan tried that and it didn't work out.

Good luck, and lemmie know how it goes.

MM

Road Trip 2010: Day 14 – Saving the best for last

I've had some pretty memorable mornings in my life, but nothing even comes close to today's. Tiia and Dan took me to Cour Ailée to meet my father. He's a seven year-old Barbet named Punch, but if you hung around the dog show circuit, you would have known him as "Conga".

As soon as we saw each other, we knew, too. We have the same mannerisms, the same strikingly good looks and, as it turns out, the same love for the love. We don't have the same smile, though, because Punch lost a few of his front teeth when he ran face first into a tree.

As happy as I was, Dan and Tiia were even happier, and that was the best part of the day. I was afraid that they'd think I'd pull the "you're not my real parents" routine on them after meeting my kin, but the truth is that, while I was once a Cour Ailée, I'm a Yurkenbaum now, through and through. And I'm pretty proud to say that.

I'm a bit emotional now, so I'll let the pictures tell the rest of the story.

"Been forever and a day, my boy!"

Okay, we do have the same smile! And the same eyes!

Me and Lynn...she was my first person.

Tiia and Punch having a moment.

I knew my chin-resting came from somewhere.

This is Echo, another Cour Ailée barbet (no relation to me). I sure don't miss that haircut.

My two dads.

Road Trip 2010: Day 13

Officer 1: Name?

Me: Maui

Officer 2: Like Maui Wowie?

Me: No sir. I've never even heard of that strain. Crap.

Road Trip 2010: Days 11 & 12

If you ever get the feeling that you might be taking being Canadian for granted, go check out the Cabot Trail. Then go eat some lobster. But if you're gonna eat lobster, give some to your dog because I'm sure he or she would like to try some. Hint hint.